In the early years of life, a child’s brain is like a growing garden - fresh, full of potential, yet deeply sensitive to the environment around it.
When big emotions arise - anger, fear, frustration, or worry - young children are not yet equipped to regulate them on their own. This is where adults step into a vital role: to be the “frontal cortex” - the part of the brain responsible for regulation, logic, and calm decision-making - on the child’s behalf.
Why do children get overwhelmed by their emotions?
Because their brains are still developing. Specifically, the prefrontal cortex - the region responsible for rational thought, self-control, and emotional regulation - does not fully mature until adulthood. When children become overwhelmed, the emotional center of the brain (the amygdala) takes over, leading to reactions like crying, yelling, or emotional “meltdowns.”
A child in distress is not being “naughty” - they are simply drowning in emotion. And in those moments, what they need most is a calm, grounded adult to gently guide them back to safety.
Adults are a child’s “frontal cortex” - not to control, but to connect
At Sky International Preschool, we believe that when adults remain calm and set boundaries with clarity and empathy, children gradually learn how to regulate their emotions. This isn’t rigid discipline - it’s gentle leadership. Boundaries, when set with love, offer children the safety they need to grow.
Imagine this: your child is yelling because they want a piece of candy. Instead of scolding or walking away, you kneel down, meet their eyes, and say gently:
"You really want that candy, I know. But it’s not time for it yet. Let’s take a deep breath together."
That one kind, grounded sentence - paired with eye contact and a gentle touch - can calm the emotional brain, allowing the rational brain to come back online.
How to become your child’s “frontal cortex”?
- Be fully present: When your child is emotionally overwhelmed, your calm, present energy is more powerful than any quick fix. Don’t rush to react - be there, gently and fully.
- Hold boundaries without raising your voice: Boundaries are not for control - they are for protection. When children feel secure within those boundaries, they begin to learn emotional self-regulation.
- Connect before you correct: A child in distress cannot absorb a lesson. Offer connection first - through listening, holding, and empathy - then gently guide behavior.
- Model emotional regulation: Children learn by watching. Every time you stay calm in a difficult moment, you are showing your child how to activate their own inner calm.
At Sky International Preschool, we understand how emotionally overwhelming parenting can be - especially when your child is struggling.
That’s why we warmly invite you to our upcoming online parent workshop: “Setting Boundaries with Love”
Join two experienced educators - who are also mothers - as they guide you through practical, heartfelt ways to set clear, loving limits with your child.
- Ms. Michelle Dinh Jones
Director of Education at Sky, with over 25 years of experience in early childhood education and a proud mother of two. - Ms. Hai Dieu Nguyen
M.A. in Educational Sciences (Finland), Sky parent, and coordinator of national and international early education projects.
Event information:
🗓Date & Time: 3:00 – 4:00 PM | Tuesday, July 22, 2025
🌐Format: Online via Zoom (Zoom link will be sent via confirmation email)
🔗Register today: Here